Anorexic

When I am in the year of Form 4 (2008), I am having a eating disorder disease in my mental. I do not know why I really don't feel like eating, afraid of being fat or stress on something? I did eat. Eat depend on my mood and day. To be honest, I do not afraid of my weight just afraid I can't able to complete my duty. When every time any people saw me, they will ask : "Are you sick?'' "Do you have any sickness?" "Do you have bulimia?'' "What happen to you, you look so thin.''Thin,,,... I thought I was thin all the time but this time really was a horrified nightmare. I noticed I am really extremely thin, this called anorexia. When I look into the mirror, I saw my reflection... What happen? When I intend to change a cloth or a shirt, I really look like a zombie. No flesh...No fats....No muscle..Like going to DIE!!! I really don't know what to do!! Everyone is looking at me and gossiping about me.

One day, someone save my life. The person was my teacher. She give me see those pictures of girls who are anorexia. Those girls really looks like ME!! Extremely thin.......SHIT!! who want to fuck with this type of girls??? When I saw those picture, I was really afraid... so scare...
............after few month later.....guess what did I look?? FAT ?? no....Fit!!!

I really eat healthy and I have gain many pounds....many!! In term of what?? What I gain??
I gain muscle, not fat. My fat percentage is below normal.. I fit person for female is about 25%. My just only 20% is below.. but my muscle is 31%. For normal female is 27%> is the must..
I am so happy. Do I look bulky?? Not really.. female won't bulk except consume or did something on their body.

I eat everything!!! I do eat in moderation but not excess !!!

Trust me!! I went through this phase and I will never ever go back to that phase or life AGAIN!!
Don't go on a crash diet, it is a SILENCE KILLER!! you will be happy when u know you have lose weight but weight can from muscle ,water or fat but you won't happy after a long term .Kill you which you won't know!! This mostly occur in teenage girls.. Please listen !! don't ever diet. Once you try to get back your normal weight, is totally possible for you to gain fat instead of muscle. I gained muscle instead of fat because there is a journey!!........this below picture is me, the anorexic girl!!